They say when life gives u lemons, make lemonade. ....
But what if all you get from life is squishy, rotten lemons!? That's exactly what life seems to be doing to me lately, throwing a barrage of rotten, useless lemons. Nothing seems to make sense, and there is no direction. A freakin' comet or meteor would have more direction than I do! I am more like a tiny, minuscule, insignificant particle, in random Brownian motion with no aim, no destination.
But I wasn't like this always. I had dreams, I had ambitions, I had goals. I had plans for myself, and I was motivated. I was confused, always, but never aimless. Confusion and me have been synonymous. I believe I suffer from Decidophobia.. - fear of making decisions. And no, that is not neologism, it is an actual word. But that is besides the point, what I'm trying to say here is, I had a Zest for life!
But it just went 'poof' in the air all of a sudden, and I blame my current place of residence - Pondicherry University (PU) for it! This place is like a sponge, or an alum. It will just suck out and absorb all of your well-being and leave you completely exhausted - physically and mentally! If I can successfully continue with this blog (unlike two previous failed attempts), and someone bothers to follow it up, there will be specific examples of how PU achieves this amazing feat.
Now with three semesters of my M.Sc. over, and with some time in my hand, I have decided to take control of my life back. I won't allow this place to be my Dementor. For the Harry Potter challenged individuals like me - Dementors are soul-sucking beasts, which leave you in a state practically worse than death. And, now that I have thought of it, there could not be a more perfect analogy for PU - it is my Dementor!! And though I may not be a wand-wielding boy wizard, I am determined to fight this evil, at least for the next 6 months I have to be here.
Thus my friends, I henceforth, embark upon an exercise in reclamation- , reclamation of will, reclamation of an aim, a goal, reclamation of motivation, reclamation of happiness, a reclamation of Life!!! And the first instrument I could think of to start this fight with was what I love doing, and know how to do best - write! Since I have already been dubbed as a 'story-teller' by my friends here in PU (though in a totally different, sarcastic sense), I might as well take this tag seriously. Hence I embark upon this exercise with this blog. Hopefully, it will do what I hope- wake up my long-dead brain!!!! Wish me luck!!!
